Make Impressions.

First impressions. We all make them. All the time.

Some are better than others, and some are so good or bad, that they’re not forgotten and stay like stigma or dog shit on your shoe.

***

When defined, a first impression is not the first greatest hits album by Olivia Newton-John and is clearly not (in this case) a 1959  Broadway musical. It is though, how you present yourself to someone which you haven’t met before, for the first time.  I find them important, and you should too.

The one thing that I find important with first impressions is that usually the way you encounter someone the first time, you see how they really are.

Why? Because more so  now days, when people don’t think much about their first impressions. Maybe because they think everyone will love them, they’re too good for you, have no manners, were brought up by bogans, culturally moronic or just don’t give a shit- which leads me back too the point made before; thinking everyone loves them or that they’re too good-.

***

This blog isn’t about how I can make you be more self aware of your first impressions. Why would i benefit you in such a way? You hardly need your dignity. Though,  it’s more so to let you (mainly girls) know that when you meet a man on a date, and it’s finally fucking over and you can get into your car, drive away and change into your pyjamas when you get home. That, that moment when you two leave, the thought you get- say it be any of these:

1. Fucking No

2.Fucking Yes

3. What The Fuck

4. I Miss My Bed or

5. I’m officially a lesbian

..That thought is your first impression of that person. stick too your guns, usually they’re on the mark. good or bad.

I’m smart and probably should said no to a second date when I thought ‘Fucking No’.

[Via http://rgum.wordpress.com]

step *away* from the fries

everyone has that food. that one food that is nearly irresistible to them. i’m not talking about your favorite food. b/c i, like most of you out there, i have many favorite foods (some of them are vegetables. dorky, i know). i’m talking about that one particular (usually sinful) food that, when directly in front of you, is nearly impossible to resist.

for me, that food is french fries.

i have to say that most times, i’m pretty good at avoiding them or turning them down. if i’m out at a restaurant with someone and he or she gets a whopping, mouth-watering mountain of fries and innocently asks me, “want some?” what i normally say is, “do i want some? yes. should i have some? no.” and with that, i’m able to resist.

yes, i’m the gal who asks for a side salad instead of the fries. b/c if i do get the fries, i just can’t stop myself.

case in point: last night we went to Equality Maryland’s 2010 lobby day, where lgbt folks and their allies go out and meet with maryland legislators in their district to discuss legislation pertinent to the lgbt community (same-sex marriage is a big one but not the only one). it was a busy evening, and i spoke up in our meetings. being busy and speaking up inevidibly makes me hungry. it made our friends hungry, too. so we took up the organization’s invitation to swing by rams head and celebrate our efforts with some food and drink.

i ordered a veggie sandwich. i saw that all sandwiches were served with fries. i was too hungry to even care. i’ll only have a few, i thought. only my a**.

not only did i eat every single friggin fry in sight, i even ate the soggy ones under the pickle. plus the loser fry drowning in ketchup. the one that you usually leave over b/c it’s so soaked with ketchup? yeah, i ate that one, too.

they were delcious. but then i felt sick and disgusted.

see, that’s exactly why i avoid them. b/c i can’t control myself! it’s exactly the same reason we don’t keep doritos in the house. or fritos, cheetos or tostitos (yes, basically corn-based fried snack foods that end in “o”). if i have one, i have to have them all. so today’s question: what’s your danger food? the food that you have to avoid at all costs or else you’ll wind up eating them all. do tell.

[Via http://lunchat1130.wordpress.com]

an awkward romance.

it would seem that the hunt is on.

so long since the last effort to transcribe adventures, so much to catch up on.

first and foremost, love has caught up with me again, in the form of an exquisite woman i’ll call Tumble. i’d rather up and leave this place.. off to boston? visit the Princess, crash with her.. at least the sex would be good, so i hear. leave Tumble confused, perhaps, but with some good contacts for tech support, and a few fond memories, before i can disappoint her.

but i’m compelled to stay. to hope. as JonBoy said, ‘your chances of tapping that are extraordinarily good. your chances of keeping her.. not so great.’

knowing this, i continue to volunteer at her arts center.

-we went out for a little extra smoke in her car, and the conversation turned from how horny and frustrated she was, to this..

T: we could even be making out in here, no one can see in! they wouldn’t know.

me: i guess you’re right. isn’t that what all the kids are doing these days?

T: but then everyone would think that that’s the only reason you’re helping us with the computers..

me: .. *a little stoned and immensely confused*

—-

she also insisted on re-tying my purple necktie, but when i took it off at the end of the night, the knot hadn’t been changed. on the other hand, she did get to reach up my vest to pull the tie down. she laughed and said that was as far as i was getting.

’scuse me, who got to second base there? am i wrong?

—-

i’m trying to find faults in my deductions, disprove the theory, and dismiss the looks i get from her.

i can say that i’ve been wrong before. “wrong” meaning that i never confirmed a suspicion of attraction or curiosity.

but.. i’ve also been correct more often than not. by a landslide, in fact.

—-

now, i’ve got two weeks to find a job, get in shape, and get her arts center in order. she’ll come back from vacation, and..

here

we

go.

===============================================

new quotes

p0et: my god.. you love each other.

me: i want crepes. i think..

p0et: answer me.

me: huh?

p0et: you two are so in love. what the hell?

me: nutella crepes.

p0et: what would you do if she said she loved you a little bit? … would you make that face?

AKA: youre not sleeped

AKA: and you go volunteering

AKA: who is she?

AKA: and more importantly, is she hot?

Poppet: No.. my definition of a dream girl is like.. a robot, with huge knockers that contain dynamite. That’s the kind of girl I dream about.

Poppet: *giggles madly like little girl* dude, remember Jesus? AHAHAHAHAAH! … what’s up with that?

Poppet: i have to pee.

me: so?

Poppet: so… out the window, yeah?

me: ..?

Poppet: *proceeds to pee out of my window*

…

Poppet: i’m like fucking paul reveere over here!

[Via http://indestructibleq.wordpress.com]

More Identity Brain Wank

I’m having an identity crisis.

I’ve been reading about gender identities and slowly butching up my look for a while and I thought I was presenting as a total dyke these days but I had someone make a comment the other day that inferred I was straight and I was a bit surprised. And today I went to visit my friend Asha at the Femme Guild stall at Fair Day and I wanted to join but I’m not a femme. I also wanted a “look how straight I look with my fist up your cunt” badge but I don’t think I look straight any more. I realised there’s a difference between a look I find attractive and a look I want to embody myself. I also realised there is a difference between how others perceive me and how I think others perceive me. Also my orientation identification is a bit fluid. Part of it is I can’t quite make my mind up or I’m still in the process of doing so. But there is also a part of it that is about me wanting the best of both worlds. I’m also starting to wonder if the butch up is about sending a message rather than looking the way I want. Hmmm it’s all a bit thought-wank. Maybe I need to think about it less. Or more. I’m not sure.

I feel like a teenager going through puberty. Its exciting but also scary and a lot of hard work.

[Via http://strangerthangirl.wordpress.com]

It ain't happenin'

According to hambydammit,

“In the now famous survey from 2006, it was discovered that the average American would rather have a Muslim as president than an atheist.  Gays still have it bad, but as things stand now, if an atheist and a gay man ran for president, the gay man would win.”

This will not happen in America because the gay and the atheist would have to duke it out in the Democratic primary and only one will get the nomination…

And just as there is no such thing as a gay Christian or an atheist Christian there is no such thing as a gay Republican or atheist Republican.

The only possibility of a gay or atheist being seated in the White House is if a gay atheist got the Democratic nomination and the Dems stuffed the ballot boxes.

Otherwise, it ain’t happenin’ !

And I am sure the Lord will return before then!

[Via http://professordendy.wordpress.com]

Older People: They are a turn on!

It’s true, so, so true. I find older women a lot sexier than anyone near my own age. Is this wrong?

See, I’ve known this for a very long time. Ever since I was younger, when I was indulging in my first sexual fantasies, they were filled to the brim with people who were a lot older than myself. At the lower end of the scale I would have someone in their thirties, and it goes up to double that age.

Recently I’ve begun to question this. You see, I don’t actually want to end up with an OAP, even though I can think of one or two famous ones who I certainly wouldn’t turn down; but this is a very big hindrance. I do have an attraction to girls of my age too, but I’ve never felt such an intense lust for one that I have for say a certain person who is in their forties.  She, ahh… Divine. I’ll admit, I love the spark of grey in her hair! I love that she’s experienced, and she knows so much more than I do (even purely based upon an intellectual level). Just the thought of her now makes me happy.

But is this wrong? Is it weird, or wrong than an eighteen year old finds grey hair attractive? That I find people who are in their sixties attractive?

I’ve read previously that being attracted to older people is part of evolution. That young girls are meant to be attracted to old men because it’s good for reproduction. That, I can make sense of. There’s a reason for it. Reproduction is reason for a lot; but when I’m a lesbian, and get all hot and bothered about older women (who I have no chance of getting pregnant from), I don’t understand it.

Hmm.

On another note, I’m feeling incredibly sexually frustrated at the moment. AHH!

[Via http://londongirlblog.wordpress.com]

Book Excerpts

I was just doing the big weekly management telephone call with Nathan and he suggested that I use some of my down time to post excerpts of my various books back on the Internet once again and I agree. I will get on that this weekend. This time I think that I will post some of my favorite excerpts from my books as opposed to the entire book or an entire chapter or two as an example.  I will post them here once I get done with my fun cancer treatment sessions today. I do mine in the early morning hours and then I try and sleep during the day. I have a few choice selections in mind already which are entertaining and also have some level of depth to them as well.

Side note:

I have received emails from some of the many people that read my books, watch my videos, and sometimes read my blog asking me about this cancer situation and the most common question seems to be whether or not I am scared. The answer is that I am not scared per-se but rather that I am deeply worried for my son that I could die before he gets to know me fully and enjoy growing up with me. That weighs heavily on my mind of course and I am deeply worried about that. I have not hit being scared yet, but I have hit the shocked stage, the anger stage, and I guess right now I am in the I WILL SURVIVE mode.  I also seem to drift in and out of denial as well in that I often mentally remove myself from the actual treatments as if I am just there to observe how it might be if someone I knew had cancer as opposed to me having cancer myself and it helps me to keep it all in between the lines.  I sometimes think of odd things such as a lone fence post in the middle of a field on a cold winter and windy day. The fence post is clearly weathered and yet it is still standing there as it was since day one. I am not sure why I think of that, but I do.

Anyway…I will add some book excerpts here after my wife brings me my books and my memory stick since I don’t own this laptop that I am now using.

[Via http://jordansageblog.wordpress.com]